How To Have A Nervous Breakdown

It’s 3 o’clock in the morning

I awaken realising

the email from Westjet


my son’s airline flight,

purchased with a travel voucher

from Avion, after canceling

booked flights for me and him

at Christmas time, did not

look right. It only lists a

Reservation Code,

along with his name and flight data.

How can I add one checked

bag to his itinerary

when there is no itinerary?

I rise from my bed with worry lines

cropping up beneath

tiny sleep-deprived eyes.

I reach for my trusty tablet

and hit “chat” with a virtual Westjet

agent because all real agents

are busy with more important,

more desperate,

people than me.

The virtual agent informs me

I have no flights listed under my

name, birth date, email, credit card

number. I type in

the Reservation Code

on the one lone piece of paper

received through Avion from

Westjet. Once again the virtual agent

asks for my name, birth date, email address,

and credit card number. Once again

the words “no flights” pops up.

The nice lady from Avion is

noticeably sympathetic when I reveal my

ancient birth date,

That and my

quavering voice spurs her

into checking the many

phone calls I made previously,

with varying results.

Avion had made mistakes

but all is now well, she says.

But they can’t do more.

Tomorrow I will connect

with Westjet

to find out how to pay

for a checked suitcase.

They do not accept cash


which is all my son will have

on his person.

But if I have to chat with a Virtual agent


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