Rhymes, Rants & Accolades from North Central BC

Nov. 7, 1974 Sense and Nonsense

I have never seen a U.F.O. Almost everyone I know has either seen one or else has a friend who knows someone who has seen one. Apparently they come in various shapes and sizes, the most popular being cigar and saucer shaped. I have peered at both the noonday and midnight skies and have never seen anything remotely resembling either a cigar or a saucer up there. Most everything that moved was of the bird family or an airplane.

Recently an R.C.M.P. officer saw a U.F.O. near Turner Valley, Alta. It was about 60 feet long and only 100 feet above the ground, so he had a good look at it. If there were any green people aboard, he never mentioned them. I suppose he wouldn’t dare. He would immediately be breathalysed and psychoanalyzed. Then he would probably lose his job and possibly be confined for the rest of his life.

There was another story about U.F.Os over the town of Drumheller. A group of residents counted up to 28 cigar-shaped vehicles in the sky. If there are genuine extra-terrestrials they are probably curious as to why Earthlings would want to live there. I remember driving for miles and miles over the wind-swept prairie, wondering where Drumheller was. The sign said the town was very close but all the eye could see in every direction was un-peopled space. Then all of a sudden you literally fall into Drumheller, Alberta’s largest gopher hole!

If some of these U.F.O’s are from a different world, I wonder why they never stop and visit for awhile. They must be anti-social and possibly prejudiced against us. I suppose if they and all their friends are really green- skinned we Earth people must look a little strange to them. We do come in different shades but none of us are the least bit green. Sick people, envious people, and people who are very young are described as “green” but to my observations they are not.

I am certain that most Canadians would welcome non-earthly people no matter what color they were. Maybe we should put signs up with slogans such as “Green Is Beautiful” and “Welcome To Our World” painted on them. I am sure they would overcome their prejudices knowing we are a friendly bunch at heart. It would be a lot of fun meeting people from a different planet. We could exchange recipes and compare hairstyles and clothes. It would be interesting to Iearn about their culture as it is undoubtedly very different than ours.

If they are up on their etiquette, they would probably take some of us home and invite us in for tea and possibly dinner. If they are smart they wouldn’t tell us how to get there on our own. Some of us are a little aggressive and maybe even hostile at times. They must have observed the war in Vietnam and the Middle East conflict. Even the bombings in Northern Ireland are probably noticeable from the air. I hope they haven’t looked too far into our past. The First and Second World Wars may possibly be a reason for them not socializing sooner. If they were watching back then, it may be a long time before we get to know them.

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