There once was a man from New York
Who ate Chinese food with a fork
Chopsticks with the meal
Held gustatory appeal
So he ate them along with the pork!

A lady who moved to Vancouver
Had a face lift she hoped would improve ‘er
But one eye got raised up
‘Twhere an eyebrow’d been plucked
And her lips were misplaced by the movers!

Her family deserted poor Doris
Saying “Frankly her limericks bore us
She recites all her rhymes
At inopportune times
And sleeps with a Rogets Thesaurus!”

A logger whose name was Leon
Found an anthill as high as the ceilin’
He was taken inside
By an ant queen who cried,
“You’re not the ONLY civilized bein’”